Do you have OLP? This is a condition where you assign personalities
to numbers and other inanimate objects. I have advanced OLP, it seems.
Here are how I see the numbers from 0 to 9.
1 is the gentleman who's intelligent, suave and wears Tom Ford. He knows the difference between a pocket square and a cravate. His level of success is unrivalled and can't be reached by anyone. He's number one after all. If he was rich, he'd be the first on Forbes List. If he played tennis, he'd beat Nadal & Federer. If he was a planetary body, he'd be the sun.
2 is the uber fashionable lady who never cusses, is an ideal mother and can have an intelligent conversation with a Nobel prize winner.
3 runs her own company, wears 6 inches heels and doesn't suffer fools gladly. She's her father's pet, headstrong and dates multiple men at once (and breaks their hearts) because it's not her fault that she's hot.
4 is a nice guy. Quiet and unassuming, you never see him coming because people mistake his introverted nature for shyness. He is chivalry personified. He is book smart, not street smart. He is either a maths whizkid on Wall Street or he assembles nuclear weapons as a nuclear scientist. He loves his mother and his daughter.
5 is a rogue. He's rugged. Not traditionally handsome but he's got serious swag and he's a notorious player. A serial procrastinator, he manages to cover his cruelty with charm and wit. He's the guy to call in when you need to rig an election or win the heart of a hard-to-get woman.
6 is a nerd. He knows how the sun works and if you give him enough time, he will calculate and calibrate the way to Heaven and Hades. He is almost antisocial and a bit timid. Don't mess with his food, though. And his tech. He has all the gadgets and electronics that has ever been made and will ever be made before they are made because he bloody well made it himself!
7 is a military strategist. If he's on your team, the other army should gaan dig their graves. He has the highest IQ of all the numbers and he is cold blooded in the execution of his plans. A perfectionist, you can never catch him unprepared or untidy. He's a chef, in great shape and is a painstaking excellent lover. Doesn't particularly care for animals, doesn't need to read to pass exams and if he was immortal, he'd be Zeus.
8 is curvy. She's sexy in a way that makes the goddesses of beauty want to smother her to death. But she's humble, a great chess player and a bad cook. Her men don't care. When you're as sexy as she is, it's a sin to learn how to pound yam.
9 is a political genius, who rides a horse, owns a gun and smokes Malboro. She is the President of a country and has a charity for the blind.
0 is the ultimate enigma. He runs the universe. He swallowed the sun. He ate diamonds for breakfast and drank the rivers as a cocktail. If zero is on your team, your 5 Naira becomes 5 trillion Naira because he can multiply himself as many times as he wants and change any number to whatever he wants. Everyone wants to be zero.
Is there anyone with OLP reading this? Let me hear your version of the personalities of numbers, colours or other inanimate object
1 is the gentleman who's intelligent, suave and wears Tom Ford. He knows the difference between a pocket square and a cravate. His level of success is unrivalled and can't be reached by anyone. He's number one after all. If he was rich, he'd be the first on Forbes List. If he played tennis, he'd beat Nadal & Federer. If he was a planetary body, he'd be the sun.
2 is the uber fashionable lady who never cusses, is an ideal mother and can have an intelligent conversation with a Nobel prize winner.
3 runs her own company, wears 6 inches heels and doesn't suffer fools gladly. She's her father's pet, headstrong and dates multiple men at once (and breaks their hearts) because it's not her fault that she's hot.
4 is a nice guy. Quiet and unassuming, you never see him coming because people mistake his introverted nature for shyness. He is chivalry personified. He is book smart, not street smart. He is either a maths whizkid on Wall Street or he assembles nuclear weapons as a nuclear scientist. He loves his mother and his daughter.
5 is a rogue. He's rugged. Not traditionally handsome but he's got serious swag and he's a notorious player. A serial procrastinator, he manages to cover his cruelty with charm and wit. He's the guy to call in when you need to rig an election or win the heart of a hard-to-get woman.
6 is a nerd. He knows how the sun works and if you give him enough time, he will calculate and calibrate the way to Heaven and Hades. He is almost antisocial and a bit timid. Don't mess with his food, though. And his tech. He has all the gadgets and electronics that has ever been made and will ever be made before they are made because he bloody well made it himself!
7 is a military strategist. If he's on your team, the other army should gaan dig their graves. He has the highest IQ of all the numbers and he is cold blooded in the execution of his plans. A perfectionist, you can never catch him unprepared or untidy. He's a chef, in great shape and is a painstaking excellent lover. Doesn't particularly care for animals, doesn't need to read to pass exams and if he was immortal, he'd be Zeus.
8 is curvy. She's sexy in a way that makes the goddesses of beauty want to smother her to death. But she's humble, a great chess player and a bad cook. Her men don't care. When you're as sexy as she is, it's a sin to learn how to pound yam.
9 is a political genius, who rides a horse, owns a gun and smokes Malboro. She is the President of a country and has a charity for the blind.
0 is the ultimate enigma. He runs the universe. He swallowed the sun. He ate diamonds for breakfast and drank the rivers as a cocktail. If zero is on your team, your 5 Naira becomes 5 trillion Naira because he can multiply himself as many times as he wants and change any number to whatever he wants. Everyone wants to be zero.
Is there anyone with OLP reading this? Let me hear your version of the personalities of numbers, colours or other inanimate object
No comments:
Post a Comment